There's No One-Size-Fits-All Strategy FOr Dealing With This
Predicament, But FOr Starters Keep In Mind These Principles:
1• REALIZE That PeOple DOn't Change Unless They Want To:
As Much As YOu Want YOur Partner To Seek Help FOr His Or Her Issues,
YOu Simply Can't Make SOmeOne Change. YOu Can't Muster MOtivatiOn On
AnOther PersOn's Behalf. Every Therapist Will Tell YOu That
Individuals Must Be Self-MOtivated If Real, Lasting Change Is GOing To
Occur•
2• KNOW That NAGGING Will Get YOu NOWHERE:
When We See SOmeOne We LOve Struggling With PrOblems, We Want To
Help-And That Desire To Help Can SOmetimes Cause Us To Nag And Nudge,
Plead And PrOd. DOing So Will Only Leave YOu And YOur Partner
Frustrated•
3• SEEK To Understand The ReasOn FOr Resistance:
It Might Be That YOur Partner Has Never Been To Therapy And Is
Apprehensive AbOut "Spiling My Guts To A TOtal Stranger." It COuld Be
That The PersOn Wants To AvOid The Pain InvOlved In COnfrOnting A
PrOblem-After All, MOst Genuine Change COmes With DiscOmfort. Or
Perhaps The Individual Is In Denial, Unwilling Or Unable To See The
Severity Of The Issue As YOu Do. Understanding WHY The PersOn Is
Resistant May Help YOu KnOw HOw Best To Deal With It•
4• EXPLAIN YOur COncerns Calmly And COmpassiOnately:
Sine Nagging Isn't The Answer, YOu'll Have A Better Chance Of Success
If YOu RatiOnally And Empathetically Discuss What YOu Observe In YOur
Partner's BehaviOr And YOur Belief That Therapy Will Help. Pick The
Right Time And Place, Then Explain YOur POint Of View•
5• LEAD BY EXAMPLE:
Go To Therapy YOurself And Tell YOur Partner What YOu're Learning And
HOw YOu're GrOwing. This Isn't Intended To Be Manipulative Or
COercive. Receive The Benefit Of COunseling FOr YOur Own Issues (Hey,
We've All GOt Them), And Then Live Out The POsitive Results. YOur
Partner Might Just Be Intrigued•
6• DETERMINE YOur PersOnal BOundaries And HOld Them:
YOu Need To Be Perfectly Clear AbOut What YOu Can And CannOt Live
With. Is YOur Partner's PrOblem A Deal Breaker FOr YOu? If So, Then A
Refusal To See A Therapist May Be Cause To Break Up. Determine YOur
Standards, COmmunicate Them To YOur Partner- And Then Have The COurage
To Abide By Them. Given A DOse Of "TOugh LOve" And Firm BOundaries,
YOur BelOved May Choose To Enter Therapy Rather Than JeOpardize The
RelatiOnship•
YOur LOng-Term Happiness And Stability Are Too ImpOrtant To SOft-Sell
Or Sidestep This TOpic. LOve YOur Partner... But AlsO LOve YOurself
EnOugh To KnOw When Resistance Is GOing To Be An InsurmOuntable
RelatiOnship ROadblock•
♣<<GREATMINDZ INC>>♣ ™ Copyright © 2013•
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